Lessons & Surprises

I have learned so many things about twins since I found out I was pregnant with theses babes. I thought I'd share some of the lessons I've learned AND the surprises I've had with this pregnancy along the way.

Lesson #1
Boy/girl twins are NOT identical. Think about it - identical twins split from the same egg and have all kinds of the same genetic something or other (you like my medical jargon?). Obviously boys & girls are very different genetically, so they can't be identical. I expect that I will get the question "Are they identical?" often when I'm (eventually) out with the twins.

Lesson #2
Twins who have different sacks & placentas can still be identical. Because my babes were in this situation, I immediately assumed that they were fraternal. I quickly found out that wasn't necessarily the case. Depending on when an egg splits, then identical twins can share a sack or have separate sacks. Until we knew the genders of our babes, it was possible that they would be identical. Had we found out they were the same gender, then we may have never known if they were identical or fraternal without blood testing. But, since our babes are different genders, they are indeed fraternal, which means I released two eggs.

Lesson #3
Everything is going to be OK. I may have to revisit this lesson in a couple of months, but I go into these last days of pregnancy with a really positive outlook. I know we are in for long nights and difficult days, but we are certainly going to survive it! I am thankful to have a great support system that includes other twin moms who, for the most part, are very encouraging. I know our family, friends, and church support will be invaluable over these first few months.

Lesson #4
You get to see your babes more often when you're expecting multiples. We have had a total of 5, maybe 6, sonograms of the twins. These even included some 3D shots! In addition to our two regular sonograms, we've seen the maternal fetal specialists monthly for sonograms to check their weights & my fluid levels. We are so thankful everything has looked great each time. I love getting to check on the babies more often!

Now....onto things that have surprised me about being pregnant with the twins.

Surprise #1
I could go into labor. I remember thinking that I would certainly be scheduled for an induction or a c-section. I looked at my doctor amazed when it dawned on me that I could still go into labor. I guess I assumed (and it looks like I rightfully did...) that the babies would easily stay in until 37-38 weeks and we would schedule their birth. It didn't occur to me that they would come early on their own! And, as I have probably made very clear in previous posts, the process of going into labor is one that I have NOT enjoyed so far!

Surprise #2
These babies are going to bust out of my stomach. I am constantly amazed by their movement! I thought that Maddex moved a decent amount, but these babies be crazy! I am always telling Mitch that it feels like there are aliens in there. I am shocked by how far out my stomach will poke with a foot or knee. Lately I've been most shocked by how low I can feel Major's movement & how high I feel Harper. They are all over my belly!!

Surprise #3
I have enjoyed this pregnancy way more than my pregnancy with Maddex. I clearly remember that I did NOT enjoy being pregnant with Maddex. I was sick and miserable during my first trimester, had lots of sinus/allergy trouble during the second trimester, and was uncomfortable and achy during the third. I remember my knees and back hurting so much. I am shocked that I have enjoyed this pregnancy way more! I did feel sick at the beginning, but I was working, so I think that helped take my mind off of it. Once I entered the second trimester, I felt really great until maybe about week 30. Even since then, I haven't felt as bad as I expected I would with two babies inside of me. I slept well until about a week ago and haven't had near the back aches or other body aches that I would have expected based on my singleton pregnancy!

Surprise #4
Weight gain. When I was pregnant with Maddex, I gained at least 40 pounds - maybe more. I gained weight here, there, and everywhere! So far with the twins, I've gained an even 30 pounds. I can't believe that I have two babies & two placentas inside of me and weigh significantly less! I am not sure if it's because there are two babies sucking the life out of me or if it has to do with my diet for gestational diabetes. Since around the time of my GD diagnoses, I've gained maybe 3 pounds...and the babies have gained way more than that during those months! I am hoping that fewer pounds on means easier pounds off! It took me about a year to lose most of my baby weight with Maddex, and then I was pregnant again! I'll be glad if this weight comes off faster.

Surprise #5
I'm saving the best for last - although I don't think I should count this as a surprise. I should really count it as a blessing/expectation/promise. I am thankful for the way that the Lord has already provided for us as we prepare for these babies. We have been given or been able to borrow all of the gear necessary to have these babies. We have a great stock of diapers and gift cards to purchase more. The Lord provided extra opportunities for us to have money to pay unexpected doctor's bills (it costs a lot to have those extra ultrasounds! Of course it's worth it though!). He has provided meals for us while I've been on bed rest. He has provided us with a generous newborn photographer. And the list could go on and on. The other night I was feeling a little stressed about the finances involved in birthing the twins. We have basically reached our out of pocket maximum on our insurance after all of our payments so far this year. Well, our insurance year starts over Thursday - which means brand new deductibles & a brand new out of pocket max - we start over clean! I was convinced these babies would come before now because it would work out so perfectly with our insurance. We have been saving and saving money for these babies, so it's not like we are unprepared, but I was a little bummed at the realization that these babies will likely be born at the start of our insurance year. Quickly the Lord reminded me of how MUCH he has provided for us this far and I felt immediate peace that he will continue to pave the way for us with these babies. I am so thankful to know that Jehovah Jireh will provide for ALL of our needs - not just financially, but our need for rest, food, companionship, support, and Sonic drinks ;) Seriously, I don't know how people would survive a season like the one we are entering without faith in a Savior that provides.

Now, here is a small list of topics I hope to revisit as lessons and surprises a few months after the babes are born...

-Birthing two babies (still not sure HOW they'll be born - c-section or vaginally)
-Nursing TWO babies at once
-Sleep habits (or non-habits) of twins
-Changing a baby boy's diaper
-Exhaustion
-Working with two newborns at home
-Showering/bathing (will it ever happen???)
-A continued testament of how the Lord provided for us

Finally, to wrap things up, here are my projects for the day. If you are still reading, I'm incredibly impressed!!!!

Please excuse the picture quality - I took a picture of the computer screen with my phone :) I've seen these signs on Pinterest a lot and spent about 10 minutes making one for Maddex. All you have to do is play around with Word Art. I'll make one for each of the twins too, print them, put them in white frames, and hang them somewhere.

These are the treats for Maddex's friends at Mrs. Vickie's tomorrow. I thought it'd be nice to send something besides candy for the other kids and saw this idea on Pinterest, too!

Looks like I'll need a project for tomorrow - anyone got a good idea?!?!?

Field Trip, Lunch, & a Project

Today has been a great day because I went on the ultimate field trip! First of all, my child slept great & we didn't get her out of bed until almost 8:30! I had a doctor's appointment at 9:20, so we got her read very quickly and dropped her off. Then, we went by Chick-fil-a for breakfast - hallelujah! It was so delicious to eat something for breakfast other than raisin toast with peanut butter and banana. What a treat!!! After the first stop of our field trip, we went to the doctor. I have no news to report! I am still about 2-3 cm dilated. My doctor will be back Wednesday, so it looks like he'll get to deliver these babies! The doctor I saw today said he felt Major's head, which was weird to me.

Next stop on the field trip: Wal Mart. I know, I know...I'm on bed rest, but I decided I wanted to make a wreath for the hospital door & later for the babies' nursery door. Mitch dropped me off at the front of the store, I walked straight to the craft department, spent few minutes picking out my materials, checked out, & he picked me back up at the front. I just couldn't trust anyone else to find and pick out my materials for me! 

That ended the field trip, but after almost 2 weeks basically at home, Chick-fil-a, the hospital, and Wal Mart was seriously amazing! At home, I began my project. My husband made me a delicious lunch - my new favorite. It was so beautiful that I had to take a picture.

Also note the purple & gold fiestaware. Geaux Tigers! YUM YUM YUM!!

I love cheese and crackers and grapes so much that it's definitely worth a mention & picture on the blog! I'm already looking forward to tomorrow's lunch :)

Now, my wreath project. I am so thankful to have had something to occupy my entire day today. I have seen yarn wreaths on pinterest & I figured it would be pretty easy to do and require few materials. I picked out pink & blue yarn and picked up a wooden H & M to put on the wreath also. I planned to paint the letters but then remembered seeing yarn-wrapped letters on pinterest, and I had plenty of yarn. My afternoon consisted of wrapping and wrapping yarn around the wreath and letters. I am still covered in yarn fuzz and hot glue strings. 

I think it looks pretty good, right? We may add a card with their birth information also.

To end the day, Mitch installed the babies' carseats. We're probably a little behind on getting that done, but hey - it gone done before they arrived, right? Maddex will be sitting in the middle of her baby siblings, so let's just hope she is kind to them and doesn't smack at them :) Here's a picture of the set-up...

I am very thankful we can fit all three kids safely across my back seat! The Lord planned those measurements perfectly :)

Daddy's girl

Well, I guess it's fitting to follow up my post about Mitch's amazingness with one about Maddex's recent change in favoritism. This girl has been a mama's girl since day ONE. She has, of course, always loved her daddy, but she was definitely my girl. This past week or so she has just been all out of whack - you've read the posts about her lack of sleep. This continued last night when she woke up screaming at 1:00 and would not go back down. Mitch slept with her on the couch most of the rest of the night. This was after her refusal of a nap yesterday and followed by refusal of a nap today! After close to an hour of screaming & jumping in bed, Mitch went to get her. He tried to pass her off to me, but she did NOT want her mama! I believe the switch from mama's girl to daddy's girl has officially taken place. Minutes after he got her, this is what happened...

Daddy's girl

I knew this would happen eventually, and I am thankful that she's taken to him a bit more before the twins arrive. I'm sure she's sensing something is different (after all - her mom is always on the couch) and that's why she's being a crazy sleeper. She's going to have lots of good quality time with her daddy muffin in the coming months and lots of mommy sharing to do. I have to tell you, nothing melts my heart more than looking at that picture. Of course, my emotional self was crying just looking at how sweet they were lying there together. Love my sweet family - can't wait to add 2 more!!!

Daddy and his girl at the punkum patch

My sweet pumpkin at the patch

Holla!

Today is all about giving a shout out to my favorite daddy muffin :) I am so thankful that the Lord brought me a sweet husband who has been an amazing dad to my baby girl. I am thrilled to be able to bring two more precious loves into our family & can't wait to see him love them.

Mitch has been especially fantastic these last few weeks - taking care of me, Maddex, the house, getting ready for the twins, & working.  He's been mommy AND daddy every day! I know this next season of our marriage may be a trying one with a barely toddler and two newborns, but I'm confident in his support and love for our family. I'm incredibly thankful for Mitch's laid back attitude - he always just takes life as it comes. I've asked him several times how he's going to be able to get three kids ready to go to the sitter & he responds with something along the lines of "It'll be fun" or "It'll be an adventure." Love that response! :)

I could pour out oodles of gushy love thoughts about my main man (if I haven't done that enough yet), but I'll leave you with a photo tribute of what an amazing, supportive, giving, loving, funny, sweet husband I have!

Proud daddy!

Sharing one of his favorite things w/ his baby girl!

Mitch & baby girl Mitch

Me & my man at the teacher of the year event. Always supportive of me & my endeavors. Just LOVE this man!!!

Prized possession

You may think that I'm going to tell you about my prized possession, but I'm not. I wanted to share a moment I had today that just completely blew me away. I've mentioned earlier in the blog that I've been enjoying a Beth Moore bible study during my days of rest. The study is on the book of James which has always been a favorite of mine. I'm still fairly early in the study & was studying James 1 today. Here are two of the verses from today's lesson. See if they strike you at all like they did me.

Whatever is good and perfect comes down to us from God our Father, who created all the lights in the heavens. He never changes or casts a shifting shadow. He chose to give birth to us by giving us his true word. And we, out of all creation, became his prized possession. James 1:17-18

If you've ever read James or gotten a birth announcement, then you probably recognize that first verse. My study today really focused on those first sentences - that everything good in our life comes from the Lord, not by chance. It also focused on the fact that the previous verses mention how our temptation leads to death, but these verses remind us that God gives us birth.

These are all great thoughts...but it's not what blew me away during this particular reading of the selection. Look again at that last sentence - And we, out of all creation, became his prized possession. So, James, you're telling me that I am the Lord's prized possession? The same God that created this earth & everything in it values ME over all of his creation?? That's pretty hefty! Honestly, I'm surprised Beth didn't spend more time on that amazing phrase.

Talk about some perspective, huh? When you're feeling down because you're exhausted, overwhelmed (teacher friends???), or hugely pregnant with twins, remember that the LORD has chosen YOU to be his prized possession. Wow, I hope those words make you feel as honored and humbled as I have felt today.

Future blogger

Love this girl...guess she gets to be my baby for a little longer!

This is NOT it!

Contractions started earlier tonight (Tuesday) but were pretty irregular, not any more intense than usual, and went away almost immediately after I lay down. I went to bed and woke up about 45 minutes later and they were back! This time a little more intense and much more regular - every 3-5 minutes with almost exactly 4 minutes between each one.

Waited an hour and called the hospital just before midnight and got a call back from the doctor on call. Now this was weird...she says, "Well if you feel like you need to be seen, go to Woman's and they'll take a look at you." Oh, thanks.

Squeezed in what I thought would be a final belly shot. 34 weeks 6 days.

We got Maddex out of bed (thankfully she went down perfectly tonight) and took her over to Mitch's parents (where she again decided it's time to party in the middle of the night). I cried when we dropped her off thinking that would be the last time she was my baby!

Late night party with CeCe. No one got any sleep :(

Checked in at the assessment center and the doc popped in to basically tell me probably going to be sent home. I felt like I've got to be in labor, so this was shocking to me and very discouraging. They took me back to a room (same one as last week actually), got me gowned up, and he checked me. I'm 2-3 cm, so we waited a couple of hours to monitor contractions and see if I dilate any further. Thankfully, during this time the babies look great! Unfortunately, we are exhausted and uncomfortable!!! Neither of us have gotten much sleep from last night and now Mitch is stuck in a chair and I'm on this awful stretcher. My contractions continued to be pretty intense. They seemed to come real close together, then take a break, then back close together.

Mitch was eventually able to entertain himself by creating this lovely artwork. (Notice our room number is 1102...Mitch's bday is 11/02 so I call this the birthday room. It also did not have a working TV. We totally could have watched I am Number Four!)

After a couple of hours, the nurse checked me & said I'm 3 cm. But apparently that's not enough change to show that I'm in active labor so they want to send me home. They offer a shot of pain meds to help with the contractions. I gladly accepted at that point because there's no way I could sleep with those contractions. They keep me another hour during which I felt totally loopy and itchy. At about 5:00, they sent me on home.

I was able to sleep for a few hours, but woke up with contractions again around 9:30. They've pretty much continued like they did in the hospital last night - a few close together and then a break. I'm waiting to hear from the doctor if there's anything I can take to help manage the pain at home until I'm in active labor. So, of course one of my fears has come true! I'm just stuck having these contractions without knowing if/when I'm in real labor! UGH!!! Please pray that either my water would break or these contractions will just GO AWAY!


Author's Note: I started drafting this post last night when I was certain that I was in labor. It was originally titled "This is it!" but, unfortunately, I had to update the title.

Middle of the night activities

Well, this chick is NOT going to sleep! After a couple of hours of us trying to get her to bed, she finally went to sleep a little after 10. Not even an hour later she was up and crying again. Mitch eventually went in and rocked her. She slept in the recliner with him for a couple of hours.

Around 1:00 I went in to see if he needed anything, and he shortly after tried to put her in her crib. Unsuccessful. Another hour of trying to get her to sleep, and she just wouldn't go back to sleep!

So, what do ya do? We get up and watch Dora of course. And eat cereal and grapes. We are all awake (including the twins who are enjoying the grapes) and snuggled on the couch watching Dora. We are just trying to enjoy these sweet moments with our baby girl because soon they'll be gone. I just can't believe she won't sleep! I am sure we'll be sending her off to Mrs. Vickie's first thing & heading to bed ourselves!

Here's a few pics of our nighttime. I look awesome at 3:00 in the morning :)

tickling daddy

watching Dora & eating cereal

Oh Lord help us!!!

Update: The shenanigans continued until almost 5 AM. I must say that those hours were spent with a sweet and silly little girl. She would snuggle with us off & on, go play by herself, talk, wear my slippers, etc. Finally, a little before 5, I decided to try to put her to bed again. She didn't seem like she wanted to go, so I fully expected more screaming. However, I brought her in her room, she gave me a kiss, I put her in her bed, she whimpered some, and went to sleep. Hallelujah!!!

Now, this child is a freak of nature and usually sleeps until 9:30 or so. This morning she was up at 8:00. I think she cried the whole time Mitch got her ready, gave her breakfast, and got her out the door. I imagine the ride to Mrs. Vickie's was a rough one. But what do you expect from an overtired 1 year old?? I am so hoping she takes a good nap (or two) today and is ready for her usual schedule tonight. Of course, her schedule may not be usual if her sixth sense is correct & these babies are born today ;)

Sixth Sense?

Well, tonight could be the night. I've said for a while that I think Maddex has a sixth sense about these babies coming. She's become a bit more clingy, whiny, and sensitive lately. Our sweet girl that always goes to bed easily (even at 7:15) will NOT go to sleep tonight! We have been trying to get her to bed for almost 2 hours...we've let her cry, we've rocked, patted, swayed, and she is just not having it! I can't even think of a time when it's been this hard to get her to go sleep (not even when we've gone out of town). It's breaking my heart!

So what do you think? Does Maddex have a sixth sense of baby arrival & is just desperately needing more time with mommy & daddy before they arrive? I have no other idea about how to explain her behavior!! Any of you out there have a similar experience with an older child?

Doc appointment

Went in for my check up today. Ended up going in a little early bc little miss Harper was being awfully still this morning. Of course, while we waited she started doing flips (it was probably the coke I drank to try to wake her up). Their heartbeats sounded great, as usual! So thankful for my healthy babies!

I saw the doc and don't show any change since Friday morning, so I go back in a week. Looks like another week of lying around while these babies cook. But I cannot tell you how much I enjoyed the car ride and fresh air - first time in over 72 hours!!!

Contractions

So....the joys of labor! I am SO not enjoying this contraction thing. I spent about an hour timing them this morning; they were pretty close together, but my stay at the hospital taught me that I can have contractions every 2-4 minutes & not be in labor! After a while, they calmed down. I've had them throughout the day, but nothing very regular, close together, or any more intense. Let's insert my fear here - I'm totally going to give birth to these babies at home because I'm not going to know when to go to the hospital!

I want some feedback from you moms that went into labor with contractions - HOW DID YOU KNOW??!!! Was it a certain level of intensity? regularity? a combination of both? Please help me have some peace of mind so that Mitch doesn't have to deliver baby twins ;)

Bed rest

Now that I'm officially on bed rest, this is what my day consists of...

A toddler that pretty much constantly wants to be in my lap

Here we are watching Elmo. The only part of my appearance I'll allow to be photographed today is my hair ;)

She doesn't quite understand how to be gentle around me, so this lap time consists of lots of elbows to the belly and baby squishing!

My day also consists of watching my house and personal space (couch for now) get trashed...

In an attempt to distract the wee one from climbing all over me, we got out toys. Her interest in them didn't last long. Or they made their way onto the couch with me.

Needless to say, I am not enjoying this bed rest thing too much with a bebe girl at home. I do think it'll be better on the days she spends at Mrs. Vickie's because then I can feel like I'll actually get rest.

In better news, we have such wonderful people in our lives that have already been supplying us with food! A couple of friends from church, our moms, and Maddex's sitter have provided us with meals over the past week! It's so wonderful not to have to cook or go buy tons of groceries. I'm looking forward to some delicious potato soup tonight :)

Also, I forgot to include in my post yesterday how GREAT everyone said the babies looked! They were cooperative on the monitors and stayed on most of the time. Their heartbeats looked great and always stayed in the right range. So proud of my good twin babes - let's hope they're that amazing when they exit the womb! We are so ready to meet our sweet boy and girl (and ready to be done with this nasty bed rest)!!!

Update

Let's rewind about 36 hours. I started having some contractions Wednesday night that felt like more than my typical braxton hicks. I kept an eye on the clock and they weren't incredibly regular or super painful, so I tried to go ahead and go to sleep. I was able to sleep but was woken up throughout the night with the contractions and still had some on Thursday morning. A wise friend suggested I call my doc (don't know why this didn't occur to me first!). I left a message with the nurse, she checked with the doc (not mine - my dr is out w/ back surgery) and he wanted me to go up to the assessment center. So off we went!!

I was lucky enough to share the triage room with a moaning woman while mustache the rent-a-cop berated Mitch about his cherry limeade. After these horrific moments, I was called back, checked in, and sent to a tiny, dark room. They hooked me up to a million machines to monitor my contractions and the babies. I was actually pretty miserable during this because the assessment center does not offer the most comfortable beds. Honestly, the nurses didn't seem to be the best either, so my monitors were often not working and had to be adjusted. Eventually the doctor came in, checked me, and decided to keep me overnight for observation since I was 2 cm dilated.

They wheeled me up to labor and delivery which was a much more amazing experience. I gladly climbed in the huge bed, ordered me some lunch, and watched a movie (well...started watching a movie). My contractions were showing up about every 2-4 minutes & were pretty uncomfortable, so they just kept watching me. Eventually, the doctor checked again and I had not dilated any further. He wanted me to take some pain meds to help with contractions and see if it would relax my uterus. Sure enough, the medicine did both. It also made me feel quite loopy & tired! I eventually went to sleep (after some ambien) and slept GREAT for a few hours - I'm certain I was snoring! They continued to check on my contractions, blood pressure, and the babies throughout the night, but I got a pretty decent night's sleep.

This morning the doctor came in, checked me again, and decided to send me home on bed rest. I am very thankful to be at home since there was talk of keeping me at the hospital for monitoring. I sure would have been missing my baby muffin if I had to spend days upon days in the hospital. So now we are in limbo! We just wait until these babies decide to make their arrival! I spoke with a NICU doctor this morning and he gave me some reassuring news about the babies. If born now, they'd likely have to stay in the NICU for a few days at least. If they make it to 35 weeks (next Thursday), then there's about a 50/50 chance that they could stay in the room with me. I'm going to keep them cooking as long as possible!

Just hanging out in the assessment center...

All our bags are packed...

We're ready to go! I'm trying not to let my return to work stifle my new talent for blog writing, so here I am! I finished doing all of our packing this evening - each baby, Maddex, and my bag. Mitch is on his own! At least now we won't be in (too much of) a tizzy when these babies decide to arrive. Of course we still haven't installed/loaded their car seats, made any definite plans for Maddex, or finished several chores around the house, but who says you're ever ready?!?

Now, for an embarrassing moment. Last night I was honored at the school board meeting for teacher of the year. When my name was called, I got up to walk proudly down the aisle. Apparently I'm huge and must have waddled my way up in front of hundreds because all I could hear were giggles from the audience! They laughed at me! I felt my face turn red immediately, but proudly shook the superintendent's hand, took my picture, and waddled my way to stand with the other honorees. Mitch claims there was just a murmur, but I'm certain I heard giggles. Now, if that wasn't enough...I was called up again for parish teacher of the year. Insert more snickers and murmurs. Then, insert more snickers and murmurs when I waddled up a third time to be honored for regional teacher of the year! I just did not realize that my appearance is that shocking and hilarious! Is it???

Good news is a woman in front of me called me a "queen" for having Maddex, another on the way (I didn't even tell her I got 2 cookin'), and all of my accomplishments. I'll just bask in her compliment and forget all of the embarrassment!

To prove this event took place, here's a picture of me after the first waddling with the superintendent and other middle school TOYs.

Ultrasound

We had an ultrasound with Maternal Fetal Medicine today. They measured the sweet twins & checked them out completely - they still look great! Measurements show Major at 4 pounds 11 ounces and Harper at 5 pounds even. It's possible their measurements could be up to 12 ounces off, but the good news is that they are close in size & healthy! Harper is still breech, so I'm assuming that means a c-section is very likely in my future. I'm still praying she flips!

My doctor will be out the rest of the month with back surgery, so I'm realizing it's very likely that he may not deliver the twins. I really like him, so that makes me sad! I'm not as comfortable with a stranger delivering my babies!

In other news, the doctor I saw today said there is no medical reason for me to currently be on bed rest. Since I'd need a doctor's note to be off of work for more than 5 consecutive days, it looks like I'll be heading back to work in the AM. We'll see how long I last! Pray for me to have energy!!!!

I was hoping we'd get some good pictures of the babes today, but we were not so lucky. So, you've been spared from seeing those freaky, alien-like ultrasound pictures for now :) Hopefully the next images I have of them will be their entry into the world!!!

Best BIG SIS!

Can you believe this LITTLE girl is going to be a BIG sister?

This post is 100% dedicated to my sweet baby girl who will not be my baby girl much longer! She absolutely LOVES babies, and I know she is going to adore her baby brother and sister. If I ask her, "Do you love baby Major?" she responds "uh huh" (we're still working on "yes") and gives the same response to "Do you love baby Harper?" She is just so sweet.

I'm so thankful she is reaching the helpful age where she will be able to do simple chores for me like throw things away or go grab a diaper. I can't wait to watch her interact with her baby siblings!

I am a little nervous about her becoming jealous. She is SUCH a momma's girl and is going to have a lot of momma sharing to do after these babies are born. So far, she seems to just get very excited when I hold a baby. She's seen me hold our friends' baby boy a few times lately and has immediately come to see the baby each time. She has loved to sit near me while I held him and give him kisses. Here's a picture of her helping to hold baby Asa - just look at that face!

I think we have a perfect glimpse of what a phenomenal big sis my sweet girl is going to be!

Fears

First, let me say that I hope my words in this post do not seem insensitive to others. I have several precious friends struggling with infertility, and I realize how truly blessed we are with TWO miracles at once! I do not want to come across as whiny or ungrateful for the blessings we have been given. That being said, I thought I'd blog this morning about some of my fears about expecting, birthing, and raising twins today. I hope that one day I can look back and laugh at my silly fears!

Fear #1: Going into labor. I loved being induced with Maddex. My house was clean and prepared, bags were packed, I didn't have to question contractions, and no messy water breaking! It was beautiful. I'm so afraid of going into labor & not really knowing what's going on until it's too late. My personality tends to lean toward the "it's no big deal" side & I can just seem myself having labor contractions for hours and think they're just the Braxton Hicks I've been having. I don't want to give birth in the car!!! Also, having a child already makes going into labor a little more tricky - we'll have to figure out what to do with sweet Maddex if I go into labor!

Fear #2: Exhaustion. This fear is present on a variety of levels. I remember being tired with Maddex, but Mitch and I had a great system! I'd go to bed pretty early & he'd stay up with Maddex until around 2:00. I'd wake up to feed her & take over. She'd usually eat & sleep at that point. I think I slept from 9 - 9 every day with feedings every three hours. It was manageable! Now with two babies, I'm not sure there's going to be ANY shift taking! I forsee sleepless nights for both of us & this makes me incredibly nervous! I'm also concerned about exhaustion when I head back to work. Right now, it looks like I'll be off only 8 weeks (a possible 10 if the babies come at the end of October). I am very anxious about returning to work with two teenie babes that are likely not sleeping very much. I'm just not sure how I'll be expected to function! Please join me in prayer that our sweet twins will be sleepers!

Fear #3: Bathtime. I KNOW this one is silly! With the possibility of a c-section, I will REALLY miss my beloved baths. A shower just isn't the same to me!

Fear #4: Time. I pray I am able to figure out how to spread my time between all members of my family - especially when I head back to work. I pray the Lord gives me discernment to give attention to my precious husband, sweet daughter, and baby twins as they need. I pray that our marriage will only be strengthened by the challenge set before us of three kids under TWO!

Despite these fears, I know that God is in control (cue Twila Paris) of our family. I trust He will walk me through these moments and provide the clarity, rest, and peace that we will need to survive!

The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

Well, now that I'm resting, I've decided to REVIVE the blog. We'll see how long it lasts with these babes on the way! I'm currently 33 weeks pregnant with our baby miracles. I never thought my body would hold TWO babies! I have to say, I do think I've enjoyed this pregnancy more than my first! So, here's the good, bad, and ugly part of being pregnant with twins :)

The Good

• Feeling two little miracles moving around inside! I felt these babies WAY before I felt Maddex and it's been nonstop movement ever since. Now, it feels like there are aliens in there! It's really fun to watch my stomach move with all of the elbows, knees, feet, arms, pushing against me.
• Two healthy babies. I am in awe of the Lord's goodness every time we have an ultrasound! To see two healthy babies on the screen amazes me. He has blessed us so tremendously!
• Bed rest (well, restricted activity for now)! It's only been a couple of days, but it's been wonderful to get some extra rest as we prepare for the babies' arrival. I've been able to get up in the morning while Maddex still sleeps and work on a Beth Moore study and spend precious time with the Lord. I'm praying this time I have now will build a habit in me that can continue after the babies' birth and I return to work.
• The blessings that have been poured on us by our sweet friends and family. We have already been blessed so much with gifts, diapers, meals, and offers of help. The Lord has provided us with so many sweet blessings and we know He will continue to provide for us through this season. Jehovah Jireh!

The Bad

• Gestational diabetes! I'm so ready to be able to eat WHAT I want WHEN I want! It really hasn't been as bad as I've expected, but I'll be thankful for the day when I don't have to prick my finger 4 times a day! Bring on the carbs! :)
• Discomfort. The bigger I get, the harder it is to be comfortable. However, I'm still sleeping OK which I know is not the case for most people pregnant with multiples at this point. I am VERY thankful that I'm able to sleep!!
• Bed rest! Although it's mostly a GOOD thing, I do find it difficult to allow others to do things for me (case in point - when I HAD to whisk the roux for gumbo the other night - I just couldn't allow Mitch to do it!). I am really trying to relinquish control to others and allow them to serve me. Mitch has been amazing at working all day, taking care of Maddex, and doing all the chores. I'm so thankful for a wonderful husband!

The Ugly

• Stretch marks. That's about the only ugly part. Although I apparently am small for twins, my belly has stretched way more than with Maddex. I keep rubbing my butter on there though & hope those suckers go away after the twins are born!

We are so thankful for our sweet baby blessings! Please pray for us as their arrival approaches. We are praying for healthy babies who can come home immediately! Please pray that the Lord continues to provide us with rest as we prepare for their arrival along with the weeks that follow their birth.